Having a great trip, wish you were here

It's the summer of 1982 and I'm still living on the Iron Range. My friend Ellie stops by and wants to know if I would like to accompany her to a house party in Chicken Town.  She also informs me that she just scored some acid and that I should try some. I have been a "say no to drugs unless it's pot" sort of person up to this point, but I find myself agreeing. We take the acid, grab some beers and head to Chicken Town. There's a decent crowd and the tunes are rocking when we arrive. Some time later I need to use the bathroom and ask where it is. As I sit on the toilet, I look around the bathroom and I notice different bits from magazines and other assorted writings taped on the walls. And then I see it. I am convinced within a few seconds that I am reading the most profound piece ever written in the history of mankind. Written by Frank Zappa, this glorious diatribe explains how the MAN keeps trying to control the people. Nothing works until-get this- MUSIC IS MADE ILLEGAL. No way!! Mind blown!! I come out of the bathroom and demand paper and pen and then scurry back to the bathroom. As I furiously write, I can hear some of my friends talking outside the door. They are wondering out loud what the hell I am doing in here. Soon they just barge in to find me sitting in the bathtub, busy copying down this incredible manifesto into the notebook in my trembling left hand.  As I proclaim that "Zappa is a friggin' genius", they laugh at me. Well, except for one guy, but I think he's convinced himself that he can get some from me later, if you catch my drift. I might be trippin', but I didn't just fall off the turnip truck.

Heh, found it. "Eventually it was discovered, that God did not want us to be all the same. This was Bad News for the Governments of The World, as it seemed contrary to the doctrine of Portion Controlled Servings. Mankind must be made more uniformly if The Future was going to work. Various ways were sought to bind us all together, but, alas, same-ness was unenforceable. It was about this time, that someone came up with the idea of Total Criminalization. Based on the principle, that if we were all crooks, we could at last be uniform to some degree in the eyes of The Law. [...] Total Criminalization was the greatest idea of its time and was vastly popular except with those people, who didn't want to be crooks or outlaws, so, of course, they had to be Tricked Into It... which is one of the reasons, why music was eventually made Illegal."
- Joe's Garage Acts II & III liner notes, 1979.